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St. Anselm	December 7, 2019
This website is that which nothing worse can be conceived. City: Nowhere

Kant	October 21, 2019
all morality is judged based on whether the intent is pure. it does not matter how good something appears to be if it has a personal good behind it. Mr Hinrichs seems to have much to gain from being a nice guy and having good classes, therefore, he is evil. City: DEUTSCHLAND

Dante	September 26, 2019
After careful consideration, I have finally come to the realization that this website is a sign from God that there should be an eighth ring of hell for professors and teachers who indulge themselves in the study of nonsense. City: Nowhere

Achilles

September 18, 2019

Sup everyone, I was bored 'cause I have nothing to do while I wait for my friend's cool black ships to catch on fire, so I decided to look at this for a bit. Man, reading a book about my pathetic future is quite interesting. And what is the deal with me dying from an ankle wound—I mean seriously—my ankle? Thats the best you can come up with Homer? And Ajax, I'm totally chill with the whole killing-yourself-over-my-armor kind of thing, that's totally your choice man; but dude, couldn't you at least have said hi to Odysseus in the underworld? I mean like we spent like twenty years together fighting for a woman that would kiss a minotaur for a position as queen. (on second thought that was pretty accurate) Speaking of Odysseus...dude...you really need to learn to pick the right crew 'cause this is just not right...I feel for you man..I feel for you...Oh and by the way, whenever you feel like getting back home, could you say hi to Penelope for me? City: Troy

Hector	August 3, 2019
This was worth dying for. Life Lesson #1: Don't ignore birds City: Troy

C. S. Lewis

May 14, 2019

This site is a source of objective truth. In my book "The Abolition of Man", I go into great depth on the clarity and background assumptions of education. In order to educate effectively, one needs to understand the objectivity of truth and the value of past wisdom. As this is completely irrelevant to a post-truth culture, I highly recommend the classes advertised on this site in order to bring back the relevance of truth. City: Oxford

The Priest At Delphi	April 2, 2019
Shmersh ta ta groush gurble wa wa petty grosh Aaaaaieeeee!!! (Translation: The God think highly of this website and are VERY HAPPY!) City: Delphi

Socrates, v.2019

March 19, 2019

Any way into the soul is guarded by the senses. As the internet is a medium that is accepted by the senses, anything on any web page may influence the soul. The current philosophy requires that one constantly influence the soul with a bombardment of useless facts and "random emotional stimuli"(1), keeping 'truth' and thought in a constant state of flux. If one wishes to influence the soul according to my philosophy, one will ditch all of the other websites and only look at this one until Meletus comes and condemns one to death by poison. City: An apartment in Athens

Don Quixote	March 7, 2019
AH!! I must defeat this magical vortex that sucks in the soul under the disguise of philosophy!! DIE, EVIL WIZARD WHO CREATED THIS! City: La Mancha

Tiberius	February 27, 2019
I was voted thanks for not having Agrippina strangled and thrown on the Gemonian Steps. The Senate has the wonderful tendency to love me no matter what I do. City: Some city outside of Rome

Robert Frost

February 26, 2019

~ How Perfectly To Describe ETS ~ "Knowledge and technology create a student's maze, A flood of literature and arts for many eyes to gaze, Formatting and fonts forming schedules set in stone, Filled to the brim with Knowledge to be known," "The love for wisdom hanging about in the air, Pressing limits beyond what students can bare. Both writing and reading lasting through the year, Conquering life through all the trials and ear," "The dear and loving teacher prodding the students along, Through Euclid's Geometry, Shakespeare, and song, The turmoil and hardships of writing with the pen, The Great paths of learning, this is where they begin." ~ Robert Frost City: Lawrence, Massachusetts

Tacitus	February 25, 2019
As the only unbiased Roman historian, I can tell you without a doubt that Germanicus would enjoy your teaching, but Tiberius would resent the goodness and lack of prosecution. City: Rome

William Shakespeare

February 25, 2019

Site On The Web - by William Shakespeare (opening scene of Sir William and Lady Juliet arriving at an open laptop computer) Lady Juliet: "All the classes of this page, and the costs of them, merely expensive." Sir William: "The purest book in the reading list is not so free of gore" Lady Juliet: "Thou pitiful articles maketh me fall to within the sweetest embrace of sleep" Sir William: "I agree—but Alas! That all good comments must come to such an end!" Sir William: "Good night, good night, Fritz Hinrichs of Escondido! Our parting is such sweet joy!" (ending scene of Sir William and Lady Juliet walking away from the computer) City: Hamlet

Aristotle

February 1, 2019

That this website is a worthy curriculum for youths I would wish to prove by writing several volumes on the subject of approximately 200 pages each; however, the word limit of this dissertation prevents myself from doing so. For this reason, it can be shown that the desired essay must contain itself to a shorter length. I have but one point of contention: that Plato\'s and Socrates\' views concerning certain subjects are false and therefore must be removed. Students must be provided with the most accurate and logical subjects and thoughts to contemplate; how might they do so if they are fed with lies? It is a truth to assert that Plato and Socrates were wise men, yet it is absurd to consider their errors to be part of a worthy education. For this reason, it is apparent that their works must be removed so as to offer a growing mind the most delicious of sustenance: namely, all 14 volumes of \'The Basic Works of Aristotle.\' City: Athens, Greece

Dido	January 17, 2019
Can date online here? City: Carthage

Blaise Pascal	December 16, 2018
Mr. Hinrichs' Great Books Course is fantastic, if you don't mind considerable pressure. My colleague Descartes finds the website rather plane, even if the colors do coordinate quite well. But other than that, hearty recommendations from us both. City: France

Virgil	December 13, 2018
This website is the only thing that helps me stay sane in limbo. City: First Circle of Hell

Socrates	December 12, 2018
I notice that you have allowed such harmful music at those pieces which are in the Ionian an Aeolian modes on this website. Please realize that you are responsible for the improper forming of your students' souls. I strongly advise you to remove the harmful music and replace it with music that will improve the soul and strengthen the mind. City: Athens

Descartes	December 8, 2018
The creator of this website must be able to think in order to write these wonderful informational articles. Therefore I must assume that he exists. I must congratulate you on your fine writing as well as your existence, sir.

vergil	December 5, 2018
I did gbt 1 and read the iliad then left and wrote the anied City: greece

Euclid	December 3, 2018
" For let each of the rectilineal figures A, B be similar to C; I say that ... a website? one moment here please ... I say that A is also similar to B. Enough about websites. City: Athens

Homer	November 28, 2018
I resent that you have allowed Socrates and Plato to post degrading messages about my work on this website. My epic poetry far outshines their miserable dialogues, and they would do well to remember it! City: Mycenae

Barry Allen	November 27, 2018
This website is sooooooooo slow. Speed it up man! City: Central City

Socrates	November 27, 2018
With all the shut downs and reworks I know for a fact that this website is will change, therefore it is not an eternal truth. Get off this website and do some geometry! City: Athens

Virgil

November 27, 2018

Fan fiction is the highest form of art. To make the best of fan fiction, one needs three things. First, one needs to find a well-known and wealthy sponsor to fund the work, who can be lauded frequently and at great length during the plot. Second, one must be able to imitate the original so closely that readers drool just looking at it. This insures sales. Third, one has to gather a professional group of lawyer/priests to defend the work from the Furies and the Ghost of Homer on charges of plagiarism. Original works are nothing in comparison, making the copy better than the original. It is small consolation to me that you teach my work amid a sea of... *spits* philosophy. Excuse me.... I just received a text from my friends who wrote the StarWars novels....... *walks away* City: Sent from my iRome XI

Virgil	November 27, 2018
Hm...I like this a lot. *copy, paste, cut out Hinrichs, put in Virgil..* Oh, Caesar, I have that website you wanted! City: Rome

Plato	November 14, 2018
My dialogs are far more superior compared to this pitiful thing. There is no Geometry or Music! How can one survive without them?! City: Athens

Socrates	November 14, 2018
You have certainly made an attempt, but this curriculum is not nearly balanced enough. For one, you can throw out the Homer and other such lying poets. For another, where is the gymnastics? Your students shall all become soft and effeminate. City: Athens, Hellas

Robert E. Lee	October 29, 2018
This here blue-belled website is gonna go south real fast! I'm a'gonna stick to my writ'n and letter'n like y'all should! City: The Confederate States of America

Cleopatra	October 28, 2018
I can still do better City: Egypt

Socrates	October 25, 2018
I am pleased to see that your students are required to study geometry; it will make them better people. But why do you corrupt their minds with the lies of the poets? City: Athens

John Calvin	October 25, 2018
God predestined this website. City: Heaven

The priestess at Delphi	October 25, 2018
*indistinct muttering* City: Greece

Groot	October 25, 2018
"I am Groot, I am Groot, I am Groot" Translates into, "This website is great, come check it out! City: The Galaxy

The Persians	October 25, 2018
Why do you teach your children so much? It will flood their minds with unnecessary knowledge. City: Persia

The Beatles	October 25, 2018
Yo man, the website is totally awesome man! Just where's the yellow submarine? That submarine is like, totally the best. Like wheres the peace and love, man? City: We can't tell, we'er to high on drugs man....

Jar Jar binks	October 25, 2018
whosa website is this? Ani? Ani?? whersa yousa go?

Dracula	October 25, 2018
This website is great! va va va va City: Transulvania

Iron Man	October 25, 2018
I'm but earth is closed today. That includes the all new GBT website.

Yoda	October 25, 2018
Good Website, this is! City: Star Wars

Rob Stothard	October 25, 2018
Wow, I never thought that inventing Simon would lead to having websites and stuff like this! City: England

Joseph Stalin	October 25, 2018
This website does not agree with me! Therefore, it's and enemy of the state! I shall take it away, (kindly destroy it to my advantage), for the betterment of our good communist government! City: The Paradise of Communism

Yoda	October 25, 2018
Do go on the website or do not go on the website there is no try to get on the website.

Indiana Jones	October 25, 2018
This website belongs in a museum! The formatting is older than the Holy Grail. City: U.S.A.

Oedipus	October 25, 2018
My wife told me to take these classes. She's always complaining that I'm "so childish". Honestly, you'd think she's my mother... City: Thebes

Theodore Roosevelt	October 25, 2018
There's not enough nature! I shall make it full of animals and trees and lots and lots of bunnies. It shall be a place of peace and harmony. Free teddy bears for everyone!!! City: My Beautiful U.S.A.

Obi won Kenobi	October 25, 2018
You were the chosen website, you were said to destroy the internet not join it.

Alcibiades	October 25, 2018
Why do I get such a bad rap in your class? All I did was try to win, and you paint me as traitor. Not cool. City: Athens

Apollo 11 Crew	October 25, 2018
That's one small step for GBT, one giant leap for the internet City: The Moon

Darth Vader	October 25, 2018
Your lack of faith in your old website disturbs me.

Socrates	October 25, 2018
These courses are not already included in state education? My vision still has yet to become reality... City: Athens

Winstin Churchill	October 25, 2018
If I had completed this class, I would have become prime minister much earlier. City: United Kingdom

Darth Sidious	October 25, 2018
Now you will experience the full power of Mr. H's new website.

Abraham Lincoln	October 25, 2018
This is a website for the students, by the tutor and of the internet. It will be a monumental movement in free schooling City: United States

George Washington	October 25, 2018
What is Escondido? I have never heard of this state. City: USA

Albert Einstein	October 25, 2018
This website is my favorite discovery. City: United States

Anonymous Duck	October 25, 2018
Got any grapes? City: Unknown

Plutarch	October 25, 2018
Your website does not contain enough information. I need to know the ancestors of every person you list, at least five generations back, and the customs, fashion, foods, and music of every city and country you mention. City: Chaeronea, Greece

Socrates	October 25, 2018
Because one thing they know its they know nothing, Miss Austen. City: Athens

LeBron James	October 25, 2018
This team will win not 1, not 2 not 3, not 4 not 5, not 6 not 7. City: United States

Sophocles	October 25, 2018
Your Great Books list should include more tragedies. Clearly, they are the best forms of art. You cannot appreciate literature unless you are reading it through tear-filled eyes. City: Colonus, Athens

Hm	October 25, 2018
Hm City: Hm

Richard II's Gardener	October 25, 2018
Oh what pity it is he had not so trimmed and dressed his land as we this website. City: England

Thucydides	October 25, 2018
Needs more boring description. City: Greece

Prime minister of Greece	October 25, 2018
Please don't come back to my country...you and your drone don't belong here. City: Greece

Homer	October 25, 2018
I am happy to know this class takes time to read my best works. However, I am sorry to hear how many feel so strongly about my death by hemlock however. City: Athens, Greece

Athenians	October 25, 2018
Whoever made this website will end up drinking hemlock.... City: Athens

President Donald Trump	October 25, 2018
This website is going to be HUUUGE! I hope Mexico is paying for it. City: United States of America

Jane Austen	October 25, 2018
It is a Truth universally acknowledged that a person of immense stupidity must be in search of knowledge City: England

Beatrice	October 25, 2018
I would rather hear my dog bark at a crow than spend a moment more on this website. City: Messina

Socrates	October 25, 2018
I'd rather drink hemlock than take this class. City: Athens

Hamlet	October 25, 2018
"To fling, or not to fling. That is the question..." City: Denmark

Attila the Hun	October 25, 2018
This website will put Fortnight out of business! City: The Steppes

Plato	October 25, 2018
This is a website worthy of coming out of my cave for.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning	October 25, 2018
How do I love this website? Let me count the ways. City: England

Socrates	October 25, 2018
I like Great Books, so why is Homer included in here? City: Greek

Hamlet, Prince of Denmark	October 25, 2018
The world is an unweeded garden, grown to seed; things foul and rank in nature possess it merely. (Well, for the most part. This website isn't too bad, I guess.) City: Denmark

William Shakespeare	October 24, 2018
Forsooth, it is indeed a fair work. City: England

Winston Churchill	October 24, 2018
You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life. City: Not the Free Land

Mark Zuckerberg (Creator of Facebook)	October 24, 2018
This website will put me out of business! Its not even as good as Facebook! At least my website gives me access to other peoples private information. City: United States of America

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